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Overcoming Bullying – in Life and in the Movies

Lotte Vesterli on March 30, 2023

Who would dare bully Sylvester Stallone? When he was just a kid with a speech impediment due to a partially paralyzed face, everybody did. He managed to pick himself up, first by building his impressive physique in response to additional bullying from his father. But he also wanted to prove that he could think and started writing screenplays. Eventually, he watched a boxing match and was inspired to write the script for “Rocky” in three intense days.

The studio wanted a good-looking actor to play the part of Rocky Balboa, but Stallone insisted he would play it himself. The studio almost gave up on the movie, cut the budget to next to nothing, and expected a flop. But “Rocky” became a sensation and won three Oscars.

I picked myself up after bullying, and I know how hard it is. Though I have not won any Oscars, I have a wonderful life helping other people overcome the effects of bullying. You might still suffer the long-term consequences if you have been bullied, even many years ago. I hope you will schedule a free call on my website to discuss how I can help you.

Why do Anti-Bullying Campaigns Still Look the Same?

Lotte Vesterli on November 15, 2022

A campaign is good, but action is better. This week is Anti-Bullying Week in the UK, and I support everything that fights bullying. However, it seems to me that most campaigns are still doing the same thing we did 20 years ago. Since we’re still running these campaigns, maybe our way of fighting bullying hasn’t been terribly effective?

The best way to fight bullying is by helping everyone build up their self-esteem. A person with healthy self-esteem is not a bully, and is able to shrug it off if someone tries to bully them. We’re not seeing many “Self-esteem weeks,” but I am hopeful they are coming.

Make the World a Better Place

Lotte Vesterli on September 6, 2022

At the end of next week, the world will be a better place. That’s because another four wonderful coaches and therapists will have learned the powerful RIM technique that I practice and teach. With this tool, they can make even more of a difference for their clients. Happiness spreads like rings in water – when my trainees help their clients improve their lives, others around the clients will be happier. These people affect yet others, who will also become happier.

I encourage you to make a difference for as many people as you can. Everyone can help others every day. RIM practitioners have special training and can help people with serious trauma, and if you want to make the maximum impact in the world, it would be a great idea to learn this method. Next week is my last workshop this year, but there will be others in 2023. If you are curious about what RIM can do, and how you can use it to help others, please contact me.

Bullying Affects Your for Many Years

Lotte Vesterli on July 29, 2022

Bullying affects the victim for many years. I know that from my own experience and from many of my clients. Science tends to dismiss individual stories like mine as “anecdotal evidence,” but systematic studies of the long-term effects of bullying are starting to prove what I already knew.

Gathering solid proof that the problem exists is a starting point. What we need next is to find the best way to overcome these negative effects. I have learned and used many tools, and my favorite is the RIM method that I now practice and teach. If you have been bullied, even many years ago, contact me and hear how I can help you.

Set your Mind’s GPS

Lotte Vesterli on June 15, 2022

Did you ever set your GPS wrong? I have, but quickly noticed something wrong with the directions I was given. But if you set your mind’s GPS wrong, it can take you a while to notice.

If you are unhappy about the path of your life, you need to re-program your mind’s GPS. A simple way to do that is by saying affirmations. An affirmation is a compelling sentence that describes how you feel after reaching your goal. One of mine has been “I am so happy and grateful that I now feel relaxed and confident as I speak in front of an audience.” I talk more about affirmations in chapter 7 of my book “Life after Bullying.”

Design an affirmation and say it to yourself every day. You will find that it directs your mind to seek a way to reach the goal your affirmation describes.

Overcome the Effects of Bullying

Lotte Vesterli on March 15, 2022

The science about the effects of bullying is piling up, and it is bad. A recent paper in the Harward Review of Psychiatry showed that a girl who has been bullied is 27 times more likely to have a panic disorder as a young adult. A boy who has been bullied is 18 times more likely to attempt suicide.

Fortunately, there are also very effective methods to overcome the long-term effects of bullying and other psychic trauma. There is not much scientific research yet, but with the RIM method I use, almost every client has experienced a significant improvement with just three to five sessions. I am a Master RIM practitioner and RIM Trainer, and I would love the opportunity to tell you more. Please schedule a free call with me online.

You can also read about the RIM method on my website.

Use your phone less

Lotte Vesterli on January 27, 2022

How often do you pick up your phone? If you are average, it is 58 times in a day. That is the number of times the average user interacts with the phone, so it does not include just checking the time. If you have an iPhone, activate the Screen Time feature under Settings to get your number. On Android, look under Settings, Digital Wellbeing and parental controls.

When you have found your number, challenge yourself to get it down. We only have so much time in our lives, and we are spending too much of it glued to our phones.

Make a Change

Lotte Vesterli on January 21, 2021

When you want to make changes to your life, it is a good idea to connect them to something else that changes. That’s why we make New Year’s resolutions, and why we decide on our birthdays to establish new habits.

If you live in American and got a new president yesterday, you can also use that as a trigger for a change in your life. If you have a goal or a change you want to implement, today is a good day to start.